Last week we covered: 10 Self-Care Tips for Coaches – Part 1
Here are the self-care tips for this week.
Self-Care Tip 6: Dissociate
There are different perspectives; one is your own, another is the perspective of another person. When helping or coaching others, it may be tempting to step in their shoes for many coaches and change-workers. You do indeed understand another person’s map of the world better and offer empathy and compassion. However, you do not have to be here the whole session; you can only have a quick taste and be equally effective. You can also step into this space before the session, but not during the session. It is possible to help and coach others from a more dissociated place, like an observer. Detached, no emotion. But with all the intention to help.
Self-Care Tip 7: Their Lack of Emotional Intelligence Can Become Yours
We are born with our IQ; our EQ which is tied to our happiness, well-being and success, can be developed. This is a matter of self-responsibility and personal development as an adult. When we get stuck developing this, we hire coaches; we do not over-burden our friends or family members with it.
You are either one of the coaches that helps the client with their self-responsibility to develop their emotional intelligence. If you are not someone’s coach, they should be the one compensating and helping themselves develop their emotional intelligence. Not you.
The elements of emotional intelligence are:
Self-regard
Self-actualization
Emotional self-awareness
Independence
Assertiveness
Emotional expression
Empathy
Interpersonal relationships
Social responsibility
Problem-solving
Reality testing
Impulse control
Flexibility
Stress tolerance
Optimism
Self-Care Tip 8: Use the NLP Technique Future Pacing
Place your mind in the future, and see what you would see, hear what you would hear, and feel what you would feel.
1. What would happen if you spent more time paying attention to self-care?
2. What would happen if you spent more time coaching and helping others?
Self-Care Tip 9: Communicate Your Crystal Ball
The people in my personal and professional life who may want more time and energy that I have or am willing to offer I communicate to them my crystal ball. Self-care is essential for coaches and change-workers as they are known as heroes, advisors, and helpers. I share with them what my boundaries and rules are BEFORE they are violated or crossed. For example, I communicate my rules for WhatsApp to my clients before they use their own rules. I share my expectation of my family and friends not to leave their problems unsolved and that when I help, coach, or advise I only do so once on the same topic. I see no point to keep coaching on the same problem that someone is not putting the elbow grease into to solve. It is much easier to communicate this when they are not having any problems. Rather than beating them when they are down.
It is much easier to remind someone of the boundaries and rules you already communicated rather than correct them when they are already crossed.
Self-Care Tip 10: Rely on Other Coaches
If self-care is a real issue for you then hire a coach. All coaches should have a coach.
